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In the Moment by
Peary Perry | |
Let
me start this week off with an apology to those of you who read my column.
For the past several years I have been trying to hold on to a business enterprise
that I thought was going to make it, but it didn't. As hard as I tried to get
the it all together and make it turn out right, in the end it just wasn't possible
and I had to shut it down a couple of weeks ago.
So, why the need for
an apology? Simple, since I am now unemployed, retired or whatever you want to
call me, I have had more time to sit and think about my personal behavior over
these past 36 or so months. I have started to realize that my devotion to this
column, my family and my friends suffered due to my concern over my business.
In moving my office back to my house, I had a chance to look over some of the
columns I have written in the last couple of years. I can look at these and tell
when I have been under a lot of stress and strain. It shows, perhaps not to you,
but it does to me. I hope it doesn't show to you, but if it did then this is why
I am offering an apology.
It's very difficult to explain how my mind has
been working for the past couple of years. It's only when I have stopped for the
last couple of weeks that I have had a chance to see what I was doing to my family
and myself. I have always been a hard charger. I multi task like crazy and have
always thought that doing so was the only way things got done.
During
the past couple of weeks I have come to the conclusion that my mind has been operating
much like a CD changer. Let me describe it this way. When I am in the room or
at dinner with my family, I am on track #1, but my mind keeps switching to the
other tracks and thinking of other things. Thus, it seems like I am never quite
what you might call, 'in the moment'. I may be there physically, but not there
mentally. Does this make sense?
During the past few weeks since I closed
the business, I have described this to a number of people. Men in particular seem
to identify with what I am saying and the women seem to be more of the 'in the
moment' type of mentalities. Most women I have spoken to admit that they know
their husbands or boyfriends aren't really there (mentally) all of the time when
there is a discussion taking place. I didn't do any type of study to determine
what the ages or length of their relationships were so I can't comment on whether
on not that has anything to do with it or not.
I can tell you that the
men I have discussed this with have told me that they are aware of this situation
and have often thought about what to do and how to stop this from happening. Most
of them, like myself, have laughed at the concept of 'stop to smell the roses'
but as we get older the time to do so begins to get evaporate until it is often
too late.
So, what is the solution to all of this?
Simple, I am
going to do nothing until after the first of next year. I have no clue as to what
I want to do to make a living for the next phase in my life, but I know that something
will come along, it always has. I want some time to just let my brain heal. I
want to enjoy, really enjoy Thanksgiving and Christmas with my friends and my
family. I want to be there physically as well as mentally to put up a Christmas
tree and I want to send out cards well before December 24th or later.
I
also want to spend more time thinking about what I put in these weekly columns
that you read so that it will have some substance and may make you think about
some concept or give you a chuckle. You deserve this and I am determined to give
it to you.
Thanks for reading my stuff; I promise to make it better.
© Peary Perry Letters
From North America >
November 2, 2006 column Syndicated weekly in 80 newspapers Comments go
to www.pearyperry.com | | |