Putting supernatural
concerns aside, we quickly turned our attention to more important
matters-namely eating. Savannah is world-famous for its cuisine,
most of which involves an industrial deep fryer and some kind of
gravy. We happily put the smackdown on our arteries at well-known
establishments like The Lady and Sons, The Olde Pink House, and
The Pirates' House-a buccaneer-themed eatery housed in an 18th-century
inn. I opted for the Pirates' House Award Winning Honey Pecan Fried
Chicken, which the server explained is what happens when a mess
of fried chicken and a pecan pie have a baby. I must say that this
enormous entrée really "shivered me timbers," among other things.
In fact, during our after-dinner tour of the building, led by a
costumed swashbuckler, I had to politely ask for directions to the
poop deck.
Another enchanting aspect of Savannah's historic district is that
it maintains 22 of its original town squares, decorated with lush
foliage, sparkling fountains and monuments to people I should have
learned about in junior high history class, instead of agonizing
over whether to risk being shot down in humiliating fashion by some
girl in Jordache jeans and feathered bangs. I really enjoyed visiting
the squares and reading the informational plaques that revealed
the rich heritage represented by the monuments-briefly, anyway.
The problem was that getting from square to square required quite
a bit of walking, which to my youngest daughter is comparable to
having extensive dental work performed without anesthesia by a troop
of irritable baboons.
She perked up,
though, when her sister suggested that we all saunter over to fashionable
West Broughton Street for some shopping. Suddenly, my fascinating
exploration of southern history and city planning was being hijacked
by Urban Outfitters, lululemon and some dude named Michael Kors,
who managed to seduce my wife and daughters into taking out another
mortgage on our home for some high-end handbags. Oh well, at least
Leopold's Ice Cream was nearby, and I was able to participate in
its 100-year history of contributing to the evolution of the dad
bod.
With its history, food, and shopping, Savannah really does have
something for everyone, including beleaguered dads who wind up hauling
sacks of expensive girl-person garments and designer accessories.
And if you wind up spending more than you intended, you can always
say the Devil made you do it. After all, he's staying at the Hyatt.
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