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Weirdo
Father of the Year
by
Maggie Van Ostrand
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"My pappy was a pistol, I'm a son of a gun" say the lyrics of the late songmeister
Roger Miller's country western hit, "Dang Me." Michael Jackson might
well be singing those lyrics today. Pappy Joe Jackson's hand rose simultaneously
with his son's in a victory greeting to fans waiting outside the Santa Maria court
after the "Not guilty on all counts" verdict was read. At last Joe seems to have
gotten the approbation he believes he has deserved all these years. It's all about
him. It was always The Jackson Six, not Five. He was behind them all the time.
Gee, Joe, do you really think sticking by Michael's side now will make up
for all you did to him when he was a defenseless kid? How much per diem are you
getting from Michael? Daddy Joe told British ezine, femalefirst.co.uk,
in a June 2nd interview, "I wasn't a bad dad." Riiiiiight. Every little boy with
a nose like his daddy's grows to adulthood, can't bear the resemblance, and cuts
it off. Or maybe it was to spite his face. After the infamous Martin
Bashear interview, "Living With Michael Jackson," during which the superstar revealed
the extent of Joe's "tough love," Daddy Dearest freaked out. "Come on...
he did not get whipped," snarled Joe, adding that his wife, Katherine, "whipped
him more than I did." Make up yer mind, dude, you either did whup him or you didn't.
Joe Jackson insists his son lied in the documentary, but said they put
aside their differences privately. He has remained at his son's side throughout
the child molestation trial in Santa Maria, even after he was shown the footage
of the Bashear interview where his weeping weirdo son told Bashear he was badly
beaten by his dad. Liar, liar, pants on fire? But whose pants? Daddy or Peter
Pan? That said, I suppose it's safer to stand by Michael's side than in front
of him. Joe went on to say, "Michael, I'm there for you all the time
and I love you. People's gonna talk but I still love you and hope you do well."
Whether or not Joe actually whacked the daylights out of his singing
son and dubbed him "Big Nose," Michael's strangeness began somewhere.
Maybe it all began when Joe murdered little Michael's pet mouse although, in the
long run, better Michael's father than Walt Disney's.
Copyright Maggie
Van Ostrand "A Balloon In Cactus"
June 16, 2005 column Email: maggie@maggievanostrand.com
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Topics: Celebrities
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